THIS was the biggest damn rally my President has ever organised; attended by thousands and followed by millions on television.

SOMEONE should tell me when the People’s Party president finally announces which candidate he will vote for next year, maybe then I will be willing to listen to him, because right now he is not making sense to me.

MOSHO! Analume ngao ngao. I think Mr George Chisanga, you must consider building a statue for serious lawyers like this genius at the LAZ secretariat.

MAGISTRATE Kunda Tantameni, please tell me just one thing and I won’t share it with anybody; why did you go ahead to convict Tebby Chilekwa when everybody knew that the man pleaded guilty to a wrong offence?

I WOULD have said ZNBC has gone to the dogs, but last time I used that expression, my neighbour's dog almost circumcised me in protest.

OH no, my president, this is going to cause us a huge problem and we better get our first lady out of the bush quickly before Honourable Christopher Mvunga locates her.